Vacation Diet Tips

The only picture of our entire family on our vacation, not that I think I look extraordinarily skinny or anything, I was just usually behind the camera.

I know, I have nothing to say when it comes to dieting or losing weight. I've never officially been on a diet in my life. This makes me very fortunate. I was also very fortunate to have managed to drop a couple of pounds during our vacation to Florida last week. This is not the norm for most people, I know, but I have a few secrets that helped this happen, and I thought I'd share them with you.

1. First, vacation somewhere where the food is ridiculously expensive. This will keep you from wanting to order a lot of food, because in your head you are adding up how much it will cost you and will decide against ordering at all. Never ever vacation at an all-inclusive resort. While cheaper, you will eat and drink everything in sight.

2. Take your children to parks where the food is even more expensive. That way, when the family gets hungry you'll order only enough for them and will only eat whatever they have left over, if anything.

3. Wear a two-piece swimsuit to the pool that you probably shouldn't be wearing. Anytime you think about ordering some apps, imagine how you would look with a fully tummy in said two-piece. 'Nuff said.

4. When going out to restaurants, be sure to have a child along with you who will need to use a potty when you are halfway through your meal. There is a good likelihood that when you get back to your table the waiter will have taken your half-eaten meal, thinking you were done. Because apparently now you are.

5. Another tip while dining with children -- make sure you have to help them wipe themselves when they need this mid-meal potty break, because at this point in parenthood you are so far away from diapers the idea of accidentally touching poop makes you sick enough to lose your appetite, even if you had a meal to eat still waiting for you back at the table.

6. Drink lots and lots of water -- it keeps you full so you don't realize how little you've eaten. Use the calories you saved by not eating food to indulge in a margarita or two at poolside. Make sure these are expensive too; that way you won't order too many.